so much

i am learning so much these days. i want to capture it all and remember it and live it. i want to take these days so slowly and like always i want to rush through to the end. although i am not sure where the end of learning is located.

seems to me that love just cannot pick a team. seems to me that love just must be so inclusive in order to be himself.

and that's so hard to grasp. because i pick teams. i have my favorites. i already have someone in mind to win. it's me.

but love keeps picking the people i thought would lose. choosing the people that i disagree with from way deep inside of me. he keeps picking the people that disagree with him. like me.

and i don't know what to do about it.

it seems as if this new way might be so much more difficult. and so much sweeter than i have ever known.